SAY YOU, SAY ME/LOVE WILL CONQUER ALL - MAY 14-31 Pt. 3 - 1986 (original)
- Jan 22, 2022
- 9 min read
MAY 14, 1986
Wednesday
Comic strip given to me from Mary about John and Me - always thought it was funny!
Say You, Say Me
I talked to John on the phone for about 1 ½ hours. We both started out in bad moods (really down) and ended up in extremely up moods. First of all, I was down, of course, because of my job and really not knowing what direction I want go go as far as getting another one. What we determined was for me going to Diane (head of Personnel) and tell her that I don’t want to quit A&A, but I would really want a department transfer, and please let me know if there are any openings anywhere within the company. I’m also going to Cora Mackey and Alan Winters to open my proposition to them (they were the ones back in December who offered me a position with them and said they would get back with me and they never did, they really wanted me and they have not hired anyone as of yet) and if they are not hiring and Diane is not hiring; well, I just may move to New York. Surprised? Well, this is Janie Boren, lover of Dallas and never wanting to live anywhere else talking. But, with John in New York for another year and two A&A offices in New York, it sorta makes sense. It started as a dream (literally) but John andI were really putting pros and cons together and it makes sense. I wouldn’t have to leave A&A and could keep my vacation and insurance benefits and accrued time, yet it would be a definite change which I need. Plus very importantly, I’d be with John. This all seems strange after a month and a half, but some things you know are just right.
After last night’s talk, how we supported each other, and made each feel positive and good again, I realized how much we love each other. When I made the comment that I was just babbling; he said “that’s what I’m here for, to listen and help in all the ways I can.” Isn’t he precious? I truly felt after hanging up, that I had a direction to follow now. I’m really not that interested in his father’s proposition now, though, if he offered me something, I’d definitely consider it. (The thought of losing three weeks, or almost three weeks, of vacation bothers me; that’s why I wanna stay with A&A.) As long as I have room for advancement. I’ll never get it staying in Correspondence.
GOD! How I love John! Seriously, lately I’ve been a little unsure and been grateful that he’s coming two weekends in a row, to kind of make sure. But I honestly think that’s just fear talking when I say that. There has never been anyone like John in my life and never will be again, I could bet on that. He tells me that he could never ask for someone more perfect for him than me. He says he’ll love me for eternity. I love when he says that, but I feel skeptical at times; but, it’s times like last night, when we’re there for each other and make each other feel good that I KNOW it’s right, good, meant to be.
After just talking to LouAnn, I realized I could never go to New York without concrete engagement plans (or should I say wedding plans.) Let’s face it, my mom and John’s mom would just die if I went trailing after John when we’re not even engaged. That would be the dumb thing to do when I’ve spent my life building a good reputation and staying a virgin. Anytime a girl moves where her boyfriend is, away from her family and his, people just assume they’re going to live together; and in a way, we would be. But if we were engaged, I could always say I’m moving up there to get settled, find an apartment, have a job and we can live (after we’re married) together until he graduates. Oh my gosh! I still find it hard to believe that I’m talking this way.
I just talked to Diane in Personnel and nothing is really open in my line of work. I feel, though, she is trying to stress me in clerical work and not enough in the insurance line. I told her I was really interested in many aspects of the field and not JUST clerical. Maybe she’ll consider that now.
I found out at lunch through Carolyn, that Cora is still wanting someone to help her out in Aviation Dept. I need to get in contact with her and see what’s going on.
Love will Conquer ALL
MAY 20, 1986
Tuesday
I had a wonderful weekend with John Arthur. And to think I’ll have another one THIS weekend. John and Mary really liked “My Art.” Dad says Bryant really likes him also. They all jammed around Saturday night at Mary and John’s, which was great. I finally have met someone who is a match for Bryant. I truly feel that. It’s great! I’m SO proud to have John as my boyfriend.
Everyone liked John here at work also. He came up last Friday and had lunch with me. It was wonderful. I do love him. You know, I honestly could marry him this Summer with hardly any reservations.
Steve (you know, the guy in Voice Class whom I had a crush on before the cruise since last October or so) came up to me last night and said he just got back from Mexico and met a girl there. What was unusual is that he said it was uncanny how much she was like “me.” He said in looks, all-round enthusiasm, etc. Apparently, they had a romance of some kind, but he feels it’s just one of those neat things because she lives in Houston and he doesn’t want to try and keep up a long distance romance. I hit him when he said how uncanny it was that she was SO much like me! I definitely thought to myself “Well, Bozo, why didn’t you ask me out?” But I wouldn’t give Art up for anyone, but I would have liked to go out with Steve. Being 37, though, a lawyer and businessman, I feel he’s a confirmed bachelor. He’s a wonderful guy, though!
May 25,1986 - Looks like John went with "the gang" to see Gone With the Wind and Snuffers afterwards (don't remember this at all. This had to be Kevin, Sherri and a few others? anyone remember?)
MAY 29, 1986
My precious Baby,
I’m sorry for waking you up last night, I just felt it imperative to tell you about last night, my flub ups, your aunt dying and… last but not least, that I love you. You’re very sweet and precious not to get upset that I called. I liked what you said about how I can interrupt you anytime. I love you for that. Oh, I love you for many reasons, but that just happens to be one reason.
Something I omitted when talking to you last night (and not really meaning to). Bad News, I’m afraid. Mary is filing for divorce. It seems John threw a cereal bowl at her that morning that she came over. That was the last straw. You know, I don’t understand how people can apparently be so much in love at first and then whammo. But truly, in their case, this has been going on the entire marriage. Not throwing things, I don’t think, but their splitting up. Shoot when I was 19, they split up. I remember because I just turned 19 and Mary took me out for my birthday and bought me a drink. We saw The Electric Horseman. Anyway, as you can see, they have been fighting throughout. I have always been leary of their marriage and never felt totally good about it until the other night. As I told you, I have had my misgivings in the past, but after that night, I felt good. Well apparently before the concert, John told Mary that the house wasn’t clean enough and made her get down and clean the baseboards. That’s ridiculous. It sounds like “Mommie Dearest” treatment except husband/wife instead of mother/daughter. Mary has even had her neighbors come up to her and ask why she stuck with him. That's gotta be pretty bad when the neighbors start getting involved. He, from what Mom and Dad told me, pushed her across the yard when she suggested he mow the yard. He told her to do it and pushed her. The neighbor, later, when she saw John had gone, came over and told Mary to leave him. Mary just cried. As far as I know, these are the only two incidents of harassment, but two time can be neough. Mary has tried everything to keep her marriage together; they even went to counseling a while back, but to no avail. I personally just think he wants out and doesn’t know how to go about it. He knew that if he just said he wanted out, Mary would fight tooth and nail. This way, she got SO fed up that she knew she would be stuipid to stay with him. After a few days with Mom and Dad, she went back so Holly could finish school. While home, the two of them talked it out and agreed to a divorce. But John wants Mary to file, he doesn’t want to.
Oh My Art (this was John’s middle name and my nickname for him, btw), it scares me to death. I realized that Mary and Bryant are not me, but they are my brother and sister and it literally hits too close to home. I love you so much and I honestly love you more than anyone ever… and I mean Ever. But, it has only been two months. How I could ever love someone so much in two months scares me. I know you get upset when you hear me talk this way, but that's me. Hopefully, you can understand my rationale for this. There is one way for me to finally be cured of my caution and plain fright. Keep up what you’re doing. Keep up your endearing love, tenderness and reassurance. That’s what helps the most. I sure wish you were coming in soon. When you’re away, I Feel more insecure. Maybe we ought to just have a good time and leave it at that. But I do love you and want to be with you in so many ways for the rest of my life. But, we have time. Sometimes I’m really glad that you have so much school left. And then… well, that’s silly.
I want you to do something right now. Before you start feeling sad and hurt, read my handwritten letter (or listen to the last tape I made for you) and you’ll feel better. Which reminds me, will I ever get a tape from you? I’d love one. Either one will reassure you of my undying love for you. That’s honestly how I feel. I just HATE divorce.
I asked my Mom and Dad a lot of questions they couldn’t answer. For example..
Okay, Apparently Bryant had a very good reason (though he never let us know) for divorcing Therese. Now Mary has a good reason for divorcing John. Does everyone have a good reason for divorce or only my brother and sister? Or, are they just copping out like the rest? Who knows?
Holly told Mom and Dad that she never wanted to get married. She said it’s no fun. She said she wanted to live with Grandma and Grandaddy for the rest of her life. She said Caroline and her momma could live with her and that’s all. That’s pretty heavy. Towards the end, John and Holly have had no relationship and John accused Mary of turning Holly against him. That’s just too heavy for me. Oh, I wish you were here right now. Though I’m scared about us and all, when it comes down to anything, I love and need you so much.
______________________________________
CHANGE OF SUBJECT…
I’m really excited about getting a new apartment, piano, bedroom suit and washer/dryer. In that order. Nobody can really help me in the days, but Barry and Kevin (my Kevin) can help me in the evenings. I guess that’ll have to do. The movers can’t come until about 9:00 p.m. Saturday. They’re coming to pick up Dad’s key to Nana’s at 6:00 and should arrive at my apartment around 9:00. Oh I’d like to just wiggle my nose and have everything moved. Oh well, it’s exciting. I love change!
Next week I’m getting my hair cut the day before Kevin’s graduation. And then the next week we’ll be together for clost to 5 ½ weeks if you count the time in NY etc. Oh Baby, that’ll just be wonderful.
DeeAnn and Brian had a marvelous time in San Antonio. I still would love to go for a weekend. But I realize the week in NY and coming home is fun enough for a long time. As long as we’re together, that’s what matters.
I sure loved last weekend. WOW! I went to SLEEP that night about 8:45 p.m. Can you believe that? I was exhausted! TEE HEE!
Listen, I better let you go. I get to break this joint in about 45 minutes.
Had any cherries and whipped cream lately? Aren’t I awful?
Karen says that Mary comes to visit her. Mary meaning Bloody Mary. Isn’t that awful? Get it?
I truly feel better.
I love you with all my heart. I couldn’t hope after 2 months to love any man more in my life. And you know what? I don’t want to love another man. Always love me.
Janie
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